TEACHERS: Mr. Nicky’s classroom workshops and assemblies are now available online via Google Meet, Zoom, YouTube Live and other platforms! Break the monotony of 2020 distance learning (those of you in districts still learning from home) by having Mr. Nicky visit your classes virtually, teaching your students how to write their own history parodies. These programs meet state learning standards, and they’re tons of fun! Mr. Nicky is also booking for his annual spring tour (April/May/June) as we monitor the good possibility of everyone returning to live learning in 2021. Please send an e-mail to mrnickychicago@gmail.com for full information on these online and live programs. (Students will not receive a response, but thank you for your support. Please tell your teachers to e-mail Mr. Nicky!)

Lyrics below
Backing track property of Karaoke Version/Tency Music.

The English Colonies song by Mr. Nicky
To the tune of “Roses (Imanbek Remix)” by SAINt JHN

Georgia, 13th colony, we take the heat from Spanish Florida
Instead of debtors’ prison, just leave England and come join us
I banned slaves, but these plantation owners will exploit them
Cashing crops they sow, like rice and indigo
Our Southern region’s rural economy runs on slave labor
This transatlantic human trade is immoral
Taking shape there are triangular routes shipping raw materials to Britain
We constantly enrich them, that’s the point of mercantilism
The motherland is finishing goods and exporting them
making up trade laws, be careful enforcing them
We have rights to defend as Englishmen
Kings rule with consent of elected Parliament
So you’d better give our colonies a voice in government
though we say voting is a right for white male landowners
not indentured servants, serve until your term is over
Some rebel, like Bacon’s men, against royal governors’ orders
We’ve formed legislatures to assemble and support us
As Virginia has shown, its House of Burgesses is drafting laws
and the assembly in Maryland helped out the Catholic cause
Their Toleration Act was first to enact the clause
“the free exercise” of faith (if it’s in Christ)
to prosper under their Lord Proprietor
Like William Penn’s “holy experiment” to found a colony on equality
hoping his Quaker friends are safe there
got the land because King Charles (II) owed his dad money
Europeans from various countries made a home in
Penn’s “Sylvania,” where there is brotherly love in Philadelphia
That port city is booming like New York’s is
with shops and docks and wagon carts with grain brought for exporting
but New York farmers can’t afford the rent, the land is awarded
to royal favorites, or it’s held by Dutch patroons remembering
back when the colony was owned by the Netherlands
Now there is New Jersey, it went to James’ wealthy friends
It’s a good thing that these Middle Colonies
easily tolerate a wide array of faiths
because in England, once you separate from the Anglicans
you can run to Holland, then you’re a pilgrim floating
to the New World on the Mayflower, sign the compact holding
you all to just and equal laws, self-government is unfolding
Establish Plymouth through the winter, if you live you’re throwing
a thankful harvest feast, then Puritan families
will follow suit to Massachusetts Bay, a great migration
pursues John Winthrop’s vision with religious legislation
saying education is vital for your Bible reading
Make sure you’re not a Sabbath breaker
You’d dissent like Roger Williams did
He said the church can’t enforce worship, they banished him
started Rhode Island running like Anne Hutchinson
Her preaching aggrieves the male authorities
Intolerant beliefs enable tragedies, like witch trial horrors
in Salem, and continual wars with Indians along the borders
although just governing is written in the Fundamental Orders
of Connecticut, as powers of the monarchs get brushed over
they’ll start to revoke your charters, hide them in iconic trees
Break their Dominion of New England Colonies
You’re too resourceful for these inequalities
You’ve clearly forsaken God, let a Great Awakening revive
and liberate your minds, it’s glorious!



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